TGIF :: Join Me In A Digital Cleanse
Weekly Drop #21 || What we "consume" extends beyond what we put in our mouths; an invitation to "Marie Kondo" our our digital diets
We spend a lot of time, money, and attention on tuning physical diets: eating and drinking the right things, at the right time, in the right quantity, spending hundreds of millions of dollars on specialized nutrition alone.
Yet, many of us overlook our digital diet, other than a general awareness of our screen obsession. Interesting, as our wellbeing is most certainly impacted by the quality and quantity of what we consume digitally And much of this “consumption” is passive, sifting through distracting—or even harmful content to find the desired email, article, or post.
This week’s TGIF is an invitation to join me in a digital cleanse, inspired by Marie Kondo’s transformative approach to decluttering. It’s a step on a ClearLife journey, supporting clarity, presence, and intention by being more aware of what we consume and how we spend our time. At the end, I share a bit of my own wake-up call and shift to a “zero tolerance” for time thievery earlier this year.
I Choose What I Consume
Being on a ClearLife journey means transformation. Interests, schedules, and relationships evolve while one’s health, work, appearance, finances, and hobbies may also shift to reflect or align what’s happening inside.
The second of The Eight Awarenesses, an approach to shedding dimming habits and stepping into a more clear life, is “I choose what I consume.” Covered in detail in this post, choice applies to consumption broadly, not just what we put in our mouths.
The Second Awareness is about choice: I choose what I consume, how I spend my time, and whether I engage in dimming behaviors. Embodying this awareness can simplify the task of shedding unwanted habits. It reinforces our agency. We choose what we eat, drink, watch, and with whom we spend time.
Time is Precious
The seventh of The Eight Awarenesses concerns how we spend our time. When we dim less, we discover what I call “found time” to “spend” on other things. I’ve heard countless stories of people diving into new hobbies, committing to athletic pursuits, exploring community activities, or even returning to school to learn a new skill or change careers.
Our time is finite, we have no idea how much we have left, once spent it’s gone forever, and no amount of money or power can “get” us more… Yet so many of us take our time for granted—particularly in the “middle” decades of life—not really honoring it with the reverence it deserves until we are reminded that this glorious, unpredictable, surprise-filled adventure of life will end.
The core inquiry is: Does the content I encounter truly nourish and inspire me, or merely take my time?
Is our digital “diet” nourishing?
Today’s focus is on what we consume digitally. Through emails, social media, online platforms, apps, and messaging tools, we're constantly bombarded with invitations, offers, content, and updates—many of which we'd rather not waste our moments on.
Passive media consumption leaks our sacred attention, without our permission and usually without our awareness. It’s like unconsciously eating empty calories all day long. No wonder our time away from screens feels so restorative.
Globally, we are spending an average of seven hours a day on screens. Many of us are online for work, school, communication with family, supporting our communities, and so on. So not all screen time is wasted time, but passive consumption of undesired content or habit-forming tech platforms isn’t ideal.
Applying A Simplified Kon-Mari Method
Marie Kondo is a Japanese organizing consultant, author, and TV presenter best known for her outrageously successful book, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up. Her work encourages decluttering and keeping only things that speak to our hearts by following six rules: (1) commit to the process, (2) imagine the results, (3) discard what no longer serves, (4) tidy by category, (5) follow the order, and (6) keep what sparks joy. A similar framework applies to embarking upon a digital cleanse.
The invitation is to “Marie Kondo” our digital “homes” by investing a bit of attention and time in cleaning out our digital environments, removing things that no longer serve us, and creating space for things that do.
The Practice: A Digital Cleanse
Following these three simple steps: envision, discard, and curate can transform our lives.
1. Commit and Imagine
This is not an overnight exercise. The first time I really committed to this process it took a month of periodic attention to the process. Choose a timeframe that feels right (September is a good “transition” month), then take a moment to envision harmony and ease when interacting with digital domains: time online with far less “clutter.”
2. Discard what no longer serves
Next, make a list of things that have been of interest in the past, but no longer warrant your attention. For example:
A community or industry we are no longer a part of (or interested in).
A health condition we no longer struggle with.
Educational offerings we’ve moved on from.
Local happenings from a former home region.
Parenting kids younger than ours (we don’t fall off the lists as our kids grow!).
Destination-specific resources for a trip in our past.
Efforts no longer underway (finding or furnishing a home, for example).
Nightlife, classes, or hobbies we no longer engage with.
Armed with this list, delete and unsubscribe to whatever you have in your digital life that no longer serves you. For example:
Unfollow social media accounts that distract or upset rather than nourish.
Unsubscribe from email lists that no longer interest or apply to you. By law this should be via one click at the bottom of every email, in most jurisdictions.
Delete apps that no longer serve a purpose.
Delete contacts for people you’re no longer in touch with (and expect it to stay that way). iPhone tricks here and Android tricks here.
This can take weeks, particularly for email inboxes, as most cyclical communications are weekly or monthly. Delight in knowing you are reclaiming your attention, your moments, your time. ❤️
3. Curate what sparks joy
Finally, make a list of interests, places, hobbies, communities, locations, people, movements, initiatives, and other things that invigorate you, things that you want to learn more about. When I did this recently, I delved into diverse topics ranging from impact investing to farmers markets, book publishing to cathedral yoga, interior design to local ceramics, and clean diets to financial responsibility.
One of you asked “How do you know what to add?” One way is to imagine yourself in a bookstore with a vast magazine selection. What do you pick up? In her case it was fitness/health and interior design. Perfect! Seek out tastemakers and other inspiring content in these areas and add them to your digital diet.
My story: I get to sprinkle on you! ✨
I won’t include cancer in every post, but my experience is relevant here.
Cancer changes your life. In addition to the physical shifts that follow the typical diagnose-remove-treat-prevent cycle, countless people emerge from the experience with a deeper appreciation for loved ones, a shifted perception of time, and newfound joyfulness around the simple things in life. Priorities change, hearts open, we have more room for compassion and forgiveness, and we are more discerning about how we spend our time.
Truth be told, at times in my life I’ve wished that the people I knew who had been touched by cancer could “sprinkle” some of this new perspective on me so I could too be more grateful than critical, more content than striving, and more at ease than rushed. Maybe I had too much reverence for this perspective, for I managed to encounter my own cancer journey in December.
One of the bigger shifts for me was around time scarcity. Thanks to relatively early discovery and the blessing of excellent medical care, I don’t think I’m going to die sooner than previously imagined, but I do have a deeper reverence and appreciation for the time I do have. Spending time with people I love is paramount, but the other stuff is important too: Are the projects I’m working on aligned with my core purpose? Am I reading about things I truly care about? Am I investing moments in ways that feel resonant and true to my core being?
When I spontaneously underwent a “digital cleanse” between my diagnosis and surgery in January, I grew fiercely protective of my time, especially in the digital realm. By shedding content that no longer nourished me and embracing what did, countless doors have opened, allowing me to indulge in interests I had scarcely acknowledged before, meet people with similar inclinations, and open new doors of possibility.
Overall, I “found” a lot more time for the people and things I love, including this ClearLife work, every single day.
Consider yourself sprinkled upon! ✨
Be well. ❤️
Miscellaneous…
Let’s gather! Thank you for adding your name and contact information to this list. About half of you are interested in in-person gatherings in Mill Valley, the other half in zoom get-togethers, so I’m hosting both (separately). Invitation emails will go to all who entered their interest on this form.
Zoom: September 9th, 9-10a PT: the inaugural Sangha Saturday.
IRL: September 30th, 9-10:30a PT: Sangha Saturday in person.
Community offering in collaboration with Wisdom 2.0: In September Soren and I are hosting a monthlong online series on helping and healing non-intimate adult-to-adult relationships. Registration is by donation here. This topic is so alive for so many of us ❤️
Next stop, Scotland! During the pandemic, I delved into a wild project tracing my family lineage back to 290 A.D. Astonishingly, I discovered I’m the 20x granddaughter of a long line of Scottish royalty (far more information about kings than queens though). Next month, armed with a backpack and sturdy boots, I'm off to explore ancestral sites. One of my stops to get to the island of Iona is Oban, the home of what was my favorite whisky for years. #perspective!
So well thought out and well written. Timely as I am starting a digital detox. The connection to time scarcity is powerful. Well done. And thank you!